Ted Cruz revealed his disturbing, yet poetic, feelings about queso

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Before you read this, go eat some queso.

Seriously, listen to me. Don’t read further. Go happily enjoy some queso, then return.

Now that you’re back, it’s time for you to watch this clip of Ted Cruz describing what makes Texas queso so magnificent.

.@tedcruz passionately defending cheese: “Queso is made to be scooped up with tortilla trips, dribbling down your chin and onto your shirt.” pic.twitter.com/8j1u4ix5W0

— Jordan Rudner (@jrud) December 7, 2016

The clip, tweeted by Jordan Rudner, a Washington correspondent for Dallas News, begins very normally. “It just tastes good,” he says. It’s a sweet and simple answer, and one he shouldn’t have continued to explain. Read more…

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Kid Rock is selling Trump shirts and they’re as bad as you’d expect

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The best place to voice your politics is on your t-shirt.

No one knows that fact quite like Kid Rock, the badass musician who’s essentially just America’s uncle you’re worried about running into at the familyreunion. But he showed up. On a motorcycle. And he’s about to scream during a game of bocce ball.

He kicked off the shirt collection with a bold slogan. 

You know what they say: no amount of text is too much for a shirt and no text is too incomprehensible to print! Read more…

More about Watercooler, Trump, Merchandise, and Kid Rock

Little boy decorated his entire kitchen with carrots

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It’s important to be proud of your hard work.

When this carrot-loving kid decorated the entire kitchen with carrots, he celebrated the achievement. 

A woman on Twitter shared the adorable photo that her cousin posted of his son acting like a true champion.

My cousin just posted this picture of his son. Look how excited and proud he is of where he put all the carrots. I’m cracking up pic.twitter.com/fVETR5FXZU

— $HMADI (@madddiiison) December 3, 2016

You might be wondering, “Will the carrots make it exceedingly difficult to open up the cabinets?” I understand why you’re thinking that, but a true talent for interior design knows that sometimes you gotta sacrifice efficiency in the name of artistry.  Read more…

More about Twitter, Watercooler, Interior Design, Kitchen, and Carrots

A startup is turning beer leftovers into gourmet granola bars

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Now there’s a better drunk food than pizza.

A company in San Francisco called Regrained is selling beer granola bars. (Don’t worry, they don’t actually contain alcohol.)

Because only 10 percent of the ingredients used to make beer make it to the final product, Regrained sought out a way to repurpose those leftovers. 

With the slogan “Eat Beer,” the company turns the scraps of grain left over from the beer-making process — along with ingredients like organic honey, puffed quinoa, chocolate and sea salt — into tasty snack bars.  Read more…

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Barack Obama would at least do better in digital media than Rory Gilmore

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On Friday, Mic released an article called “Obama considering post-presidential media career, sources say.” 

Even though the article contains a statement from White House communications director Jen Psaki in which she states, “While the president will remain actively engaged in inspiring young people and he is interested in the changing ways people consume information, he has no plans to get into the media business after he leaves office,” we’re all spending our Friday evening talking about these rumors.

So why would Barack Obama desire a career in new media after spending eight years rapidly aging due to the massive stress of being president of the USA? Could it be a love for content, a passion for meals consisting of free cereal and seltzer or a desire to download sick apps like Meerkat that will inevitably fade before ever catching on with the general public? Read more…

More about Watercooler, Content, Gilmore Girls, The Media Business, and Rumors

Are you the owner of this dog wearing a sweater and blue pants?

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Has your dog gone missing? If so, was your dog last seen wearing a sweater and blue pants?

Yesterday afternoon, the Bellevue, Washington police department tweeted a photo of a missing dog that has been climbing in retweets.

In their description, they mentioned that the dog was “wearing a sweater and blue pants” and included a captivating photo.

Is this your dog? Caught by Officer at Robinswood Park. Was wearing a sweater and blue pants, and very angry. Contact @VCAPetHealth Issaquah pic.twitter.com/MCRqEQzzjs

— Bellevue, WA Police (@BvuePD) December 1, 2016 Read more…

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Man catches a catfish that, simply put, is f*cking huge

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The word “fish” doesn’t do this creature justice.

“Loch Ness Monster” or “small whale” might be more appropriate for this 112-pound catfish caught in the Northeast Cape Fear River in North Carolina.

On the day before Thanksgiving, Riahn Brewington found this monstrous catfish. 

Brewington told a North Carolina ABC affiliate about the fish, saying, “In the water, it felt like it was pretty big, but like I said being that big I thought it would have already snapped the line, but I didn’t realize how big he was until I actually got my hands underneath him.” Read more…

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30 gifts for the person in your life who is still mad at Nate Silver

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Have you heard the news about the election?

It was a real upset, especially because polls reflected an outcome which was not the one that ended up happening.

For some, placing trust in the polls was the only way they survived the weeks prior to the election. However, this resulted in a lot of anger following the results. Namely a lot of anger at Nate Silver, the man behind the site FiveThirtyEight

And if one of the people angry at Nate Silver happens to be on your holiday shopping list, then here are some ideas for what to buy them. Read more…

More about Holiday 2016, Holiday Gift Guide, Watercooler, Holidays, and Gift Guide

Felicity Jones finally reveals which ‘Star Wars’ character would dance to Beyoncé

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It’s impossible to watch any Stars Wars movie without wondering, “WHICH ONE OF THESE CHARACTERS WOULD DANCE TO BEYONCÉ?”

Finally, Felicity Jones has answered that question for us. Spoiler alert: it’s not Darth Vader.

She also reveals which character is most likely to get drunk at brunch, who is most likely to catcall a woman and who is most likely to re-gift your Christmas present. All designations, which have somehow never been given to these characters. 

More about Viral Video, Watercooler, Beyonce, Star Wars, and Felicity Jones

30 gifts for the person who really believes they can build a time machine and fix 2016

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It’s no surprise that 2016 has been a bad year, for so many, many, many reasons.

Some of us have accepted this, while others think there’s got to be a way to stop 2016 from happening the way it did.

A person like that might just be on your holiday shopping list. In that case, here are some ideas of gifts that might help them in their quest to fix a bad, bad year.

1How To Build A Time Machine by Paul Davies

Image: amazon

Price: $14.00
They need to start somewhere.

2Large Hadron Collider

Image: nasa

Price: Not exactly for sale.
But, this will definitely help. Read more…

More about Watercooler, Humor, Time Machine, Gift Guide, and 2016